Holiday Travels

Somewhere between the relief and ecstasy of being done with finals and excitement of finally going back home, I have managed to completely stress myself out about the actual traveling. Not quite at finals-level anxiety but close. The knot in my chest, resembling an asthma attack, is omnipresent. The endless list of things to do before leaving keeps adding to itself in my head and I can hardly manage to sit still for more than a few minutes. It takes me forever to finally calm my brain down to the point that sleep is possible. In fact, the past couple nights, I haven't been able to fall asleep without the help of medication.

Simply Sleep is awesome, by the way.

The conclusion to the insanity of the past few days? There's simply not enough time over the holiday break for me to give everyone that I want to see a proper visit. There are so many people that I haven't seen in a long time, especially my Momma. The guilt that I feel for not being able to dedicate a significant amount of time into visiting each person that I want to see, in addition to the stress of not having a detailed schedule for the coming week, is overwhelming.

An interesting quirk I've discovered about myself is that I try to make up for not having a schedule by being as prepared for what I know is coming as possible. Like the flights tomorrow, for example. I started packing on Friday, checked us in online as soon as the opportunity was available, paid the baggage fee for our one checked bag, printed boarding passes and checked luggage receipt, printed airport parking confirmations, started packing snacks and lunch, cleaned house, got my oil changed, charged the Kindle, cleaned out my car... Yeah. I've been busy.

Welcome to adulthood and the two-week vacation.

Now, I will have an opportunity to see everyone at the wedding in May. (Meaning I won't have to wait a year to see my family. What?? What is this nonsense???) That does make me feel a teensy bit better.

The obvious solution is I need to move back to California. The question is: when? I guess I should start looking for potential post doc positions.

In other news, we've been discussing what should go into the garden of our eventual house. So far on the list we have:

• Avocado tree
• Clementine tree
• Tomato plant
• Cilantro
• Basil
• Mint
• Jalapeno 
• Pecan tree
• Apple tree
• Bell peppers
• Cucumber
• Garlic
• Onion
• Parsley

I have no idea if all of those things can be grown together in a single climate. Or how much land our dream garden requires. But it would be nice!! Any other suggestions to add to the list?

Done with Finals! FOREVER!

So fall semester is officially done. My requirements for my degree are (almost) done. The classes that will require finals? DONE. No more finals for me. Forever.

FOR-EV-ERRRRRR!!!!

What? Pinkie Pie says it best :)

Things that have changed in the last... 4 months? 

• I'm officially switching from a Master's to a PhD. :) 
• A result of: wanting a PhD eventually and finally figuring out what I want to do and being able to tailor my current project to that ideal. SCORE!

• I will be teaching again next semester. DQ's Marine Botany lab!
• Apparently I'm next in the rotation of DQ's grad students to teach the lab portion of her class. The nice thing is that I won't have to do all of the grading by myself!

• My wedding dress came in and I went for my fitting and supposedly the alterations are done. Woo!
• I was asked if I wanted to wait for the alterations to be done at a later date. I said no. The sooner things can get checked off of my list, the better!

• Lots of wedding details are coming together, thankfully. Trying to get as much done as possible.
• The dress... the tuxes... figuring out the favors... making my veil... the schedule... wedding party gifts, toasting flutes and cake serving set, and staying within budget! That was a very happy order.

• The guest list is by far the worst part of wedding planning.
• I don't think I've said a truer statement.

• Dissertation proposal still not written, but that's my assignment for myself next semester. Oh and taking quals. 
• :-/

I think things are falling into place very nicely! We're leaving for California for the holidays next week (SO. STOKED.) and I actually get to see my hun bun for an entire TWO WEEKS. That hasn't happened since this summer! 

Christmas gifts this year are rather small. While we don't have to pay for the wedding anymore (still feeling the blessings of an amazing family, bee-tee-dubs), we're still kinda in the not-able-to-afford-lavish-gifts income bracket. Sticking to small gifts for the immediate family and baked goodies for everyone else this year. Apparently my gingerbread cookies are a hit! The tin that I brought for my lab mates yesterday was hoovered by the end of the day. The only issue is figuring out how to get baked goodies to the family in California since we're flying instead of driving this year. 

And you know? I keep getting asked by family members what I want for Christmas this year. And while there are things that I wouldn't mind getting, I can honestly say that I'm good without gifts this year. All I want is to spend time with family that I haven't seen in a year, and my wedding is still happening. I'm good. No. I'm GREAT. 

Happy holidays, everyone :)

Roller Coaster Week

The past week has been an emotional roller coaster in the most literal way I can express. I have never experienced so many ups and downs in such a short amount of time, that, honestly I was tipsy from the emotional whiplash and needed to sit down.

Let's start with last Thursday, my birthday. Not a remarkable day as far as birthdays go. It was actually kind of very sucky. The birthday wishes from friends and family, in addition to a nice birthday dinner at the Kemah Boardwalk and a ferris wheel ride (eee!) helped stave off the suckiness until later in the evening.

I had been notified that I would have to take care of my fees for school this year, which isn't much compared to what I had to pay for undergrad. However, when you think that you have a scholarship for the term of your enrollment, and find out that you don't, it's kind of a slap in the face. George wasn't sure that he was going to have funding for this year either, and I could feel this sinking feeling in my gut that something's gotta give. How could I possibly justify to myself that I needed to pay for a wedding, when I've always been the person to put school first? How could I possibly pay for a wedding when we didn't (and still don't) know our funding situation for the year? I couldn't. And neither could George.

So at dinner, we decided that we would cancel our wedding in May so that we could reserve the money for paying for school if needed. As soon as the decision was made, I felt awful (and broke down in tears) but I also felt immensely relieved. Heartbroken emails were sent, canceling what we couldn't use for any contingency plans, and I started thinking about what to do instead.

Elope? I imagined being eviscerated by my mother in numerous ways that made any Fright Night movie look like Disneyland's Haunted Mansion by comparison. Not only that, I wanted her there, whatever we did. We both wanted our families present wherever and whenever we decided to get married.

The brainstorming turned to San Francisco City Hall as we had originally planned, only this time during winter break 2011. We're going to be in California anyways visiting for the holidays, our families would be off from work, and it seemed like the perfect solution. However, work schedules and city hall availability dates were not cooperating. I was screaming to myself and anyone who I was talking to that day

THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE SIMPLER, DAMMIT!!!


I was almost in tears (again) when I called my fabulous/gracious/generous aunt to ask for my cousins' winter break schedule. It appeared that nothing was going to work for getting married over winter break. And then she suggested the most mind blowing and generous idea I have ever heard in my life:

"What if your grandma and I took over paying for the rest of the wedding if you can get everything back for the May date?"


(If you couldn't tell, that was the point that I had to sit down.)

I couldn't fathom someone voluntarily taking care of everything. That's a lot of money! It felt like too much to accept. But according to my aunt and grandma, I was going to receive help anyway. I've always been the kind of person to try to take care of things on my own, and I don't like asking for help. It never really occurred to me to ask. Silly? Probably.

I've never been religious by any means, but in that moment, I felt so... BLESSED. I couldn't believe that we were going to get the wedding we wanted and planned for without having to break the bank. I still feel incredibly blessed with such generous and loving family. So unbelievably lucky.

The next 24 hours consisted of me frantically emailing and calling the vendors that we had canceled with, and miraculously everything was still available. No refunds dispersed, contracts still honorable. Like magic, the wedding-date-that-almost-was materialized, as if it hadn't gone anywhere.

A quote that I want to share comes from a conversation with my uncle, explaining the changes:

Me: Well, we were trying to pay for it ourselves...
Uncle: WHY would you do THAT??
Me: Because I'm silly, apparently.


So while my actual birthday was probably one of the worst of my life so far, this year will be great. I can feel it :)

Oh, and I also went on a research cruise for 8 days. The water was a gorgeous cerulean blue and we managed to convince the captain to let us have a "fire drill and man overboard exercise." AKA each of us scientists got to man the fire hose and jump off the back of the boat and swim around for about an hour.

And I almost got pinched by a crab.

Well, Hello Again.

Many apologies for the long hiatus on posting. I know you all have been DYING to know what I've been up to since my last post. A quick summary of happenings of the past few months:

I have...

*...moved to Houston.

*...traveled to San Francisco to visit future sister-in-law and get wedding details arranged (all successes!)

*...bought my wedding dress. (*squee!*)

*...started working as a graduate research assistant at the Galveston A&M campus. The new Ocean and Coastal Studies Building is SO PRETTY. I'll have to take pictures and post next time.

*...been on a research cruise out in the Gulf of Mexico (and will be doing so again next week!).

*...been reading for my thesis proposal (I was supposed to have it written by the end of summer, but there's SO MUCH to read).

*...put up drapes in the living room, dining room and bedroom. So homey and it makes being in the first two rooms a lot more bearable in the morning.

*...made my own hummus.

*...ordered wedding invitations, reply cards, thank you cards, save the dates (all with free envelopes included!) and place cards. I love vistaprint :)

*...taken a day trip to Rice Village.

*...hung out with future sister-in-law for a few days in Houston which included: seeing Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 at midnight, a beach day in Galveston, tapas in Rice Village and general laziness.

*...taken part in crazy water month in the lab.

*...tried to go see the Houston Symphony Orchestra perform the Lord of the Rings soundtrack while the movie played on a big screen, but failed. So we improvised and watch the special extended edition at home really loudly instead.

*...dog-sat a vicious demon. No really. He was a vindictive little monster who is no longer welcome in my house.

And that brings us to the present. Right now I'm still reading for my proposal. Well, obviously not right this second, but that's what has been occupying most of my time. Rather, it's more me trying to read for my proposal and really just feeling burned out about it. It's impossible to read or write in a cubicle. It's impossible for me to want to get things done when working at home. So what now? Do I need to take a week-long vacation and come back to it? To take a vacation would require going somewhere and spending money that I don't have. I've been working from home for two days and being stuck inside is driving me insane. I suppose I'm at an impasse. I leave for a cruise on Monday, and will come back the following Tuesday, which leaves a week and a half until school starts. Do I really want to start the school year feeling burned out? Not really. I only have 2 real classes plus a seminar and research hours.

Maybe I will take a week off or something. Hopefully that will fix me.

Year One: Complete.

I finished classes, both for teaching and for taking, on May 9th at 11:30 pm. The take home final was tedious and annoying, but I finished. Ever since, I have been over the moon. No more teaching. I'm done with the bulk of my classes. I'm a year and a half (most likely) from finishing my Master's degree. It's strange to think that this time last year I was graduating from undergrad. It feels like so much longer ago. It's also strange to think that I'm still 22. For some reason I feel like I should be older. I feel older. Twenty-two sounds really young, and truthfully I'm one of the youngest grad students in the department. But I don't feel that way.

There were definitely ups and downs over the course of this semester. Most of the downs to do with assignments for which expectations were not made clear, uncertainties with what concepts were going to be asked of students on exams, and dealing with juggling teaching 3 classes and taking 3 classes. All in addition to the myriad of situations of undergrads-and-their-lack-of-common-sense.

The ups... this will take me a minute.

- Going out on a boat on Galveston Bay to collect samples and falling into the best sleep I had had in months at 8:30 that night until 6:30 the next morning.
- Teaching my students about recycling and really cool animals that I find awesome. And then having several students pipe in about options for recycling. And then seeing their eyes widen and their faces screw up in concentration as they contemplate how big a blue whale really is when I show them a baleen tooth.
- Talking about concepts related to my thesis in my Biogeochemistry of Estuaries class (taught by one of my committee members!) and debating about what's going on there.
- Booking a venue for our wedding! And planning a trip out to California to investigate vendors.
- Planning a summer that will involve a full time paying job in a lab that I enjoy being in and research cruises out on the Gulf :)
- Almost weekly meetings for lunch and/or drinks with my dear friend and bridesmaid Alicia, who got engaged two days ago! I'm so happy and excited for her and her now fiancee! Wow that's weird. But a good weird.

I mentioned in my previous post (or rather the comments) that I should give at least one story about the good kids in my classes. As I racked my brain, I found that there's really not a story about the good kids. I enjoyed having them in my classes, and they gave me a ray of hope that the world may not end after all. Though for a short story, in the last lab of the semester, Nekton/Benthos, we discussed the effects of pollution through non-recyclable plastics, what different animals live where, and then a series of video clips about things that I find awesome followed (i.e. bubble netting, dolphin longshore feeding, Christmas Island crab spawning, flamboyant cuttlefish, pretty much anything narrated by David Attenborough) and a video about overfishing (look up Blue Planet: Deep Trouble episode).

I swear to god, everything this man says sounds AMAZING. ALWAYS. By far, my favorite documentary narrator.

This was the class that a couple of students spoke up about other options of where to recycle. At the end, one pair of students that had piped in in the discussion came up to talk to me at the end of class to talk about a book she had read for a different class in Environmental Studies. I forget the name of the book, I'll email her about it later, but she said that she was so moved by it that she decided to not eat fish, and she had previously not given any thought to it. It was really... something. I felt fortunate to have been her TA.


In other news, we start our move to Houston on Wednesday. I haven't really started packing yet. Maybe I should start packing up the office tonight. It'll give me something to do other than re-watch the 7th season of Gilmore Girls. I've also been investigating washers and dryers. We're FINALLY moving to an apartment with washer/dryer connections and while it would be cheaper to buy off of craigslist, I'd rather buy new. I think it's worth the cost to invest in something new that I can get fixed in case of accidents. Plus, with applying for a card from the store, I can pay off the washer and dryer but keep the card for future big purchases. It feels so adult!

After moving, we have a week to get settled before jetting off to California to tour our venue and investigate the florist, photographers, cake bakers, hotels, rehearsal dinner locations, and observe a set up of a wedding at the venue. It's going to be a packed weekend, but I'm really looking forward to it. It'll be nice to get something concrete done and not school related for the next couple weeks.

*face-palm*

A while ago I had a student miss a class and she didn't email me or come talk to me about missing it. So I was really surprised when she submitted a data form for the class she didn't attend. I took a closer look and it was a xeroxed copy of her lab partner's data form. She just scribbled out his name and wrote in hers.

At first I wasn't sure how to deal with her because I had never had that happen before. So when she was done with the lab I took her outside and showed her the data form and told her "This is plagiarism and I can't accept this data form. I don't want to have to report you to the Aggie Honor Code Office."

For those of you that aren't Aggies, we at Texas A&M have an honor code that all students must abide by:

"An Aggie does not lie, cheat, or steal, or tolerate those who do."

The Honor Code Office (or Academic Integrity Office) handles cases of cheating and plagiarism, and students can be expelled for plagiarism depending on the severity.

Her response to my statement was "Oh my gosh, I didn't think about it that way! I'm so sorry, thank you for letting me know."

In my head I'm thinking "How else would you think about it? You took your partner's data form, xeroxed it, and tried to pass it off as your own. That's the scenario definition of plagiarism."

Anyhow, I give my students the opportunity to complete extra credit by finding scientific articles and writing a one page summary of the article. I reminded her of the opportunity and said that she can make up the points that way.

She came by my office 5 minutes to the deadline and handed me a stack of papers, along with her Fandango ticket to see African Cats, and then left. A few minutes after she left I looked through the papers to find:

- a scientific article on coral reefs (NOT a summary, just the article)
- a scientific article on harmful algal blooms (again, NOT a summary, just the article)
- an incomplete google docs printout of what looks to be a summary on beached oiled seabird surveys (nothing related to the aforementioned articles).

Confused, I emailed her asking if she misunderstood the assignment or if there was a mix up. She emailed back about a half hour later saying "Oh my goodness, I gave you the wrong stuff! I already left town for the weekend, can I email them to you?"

I said yes she can email it. If it's a simple mix up I have no problem giving her the opportunity to rectify the situation.

This morning I wake up to no email from her. So I emailed her this morning saying "I need your summaries (SUMMARIES, not the articles, but please include a works cited of the articles you summarized) via email by 5 pm today. In fairness to those students that turned theirs in on time, after 5 pm, your submission will be considered void and won't count as extra credit."

In my head I'm thinking, "If someone wants to go from a C to a B or a B to an A that badly, if they know they did something wrong and asked for an opportunity to correct their mistake, they would do so ASAP."

It's now 11 pm and I haven't even heard a "Sorry, I couldn't get to my email, here's my stuff." Obviously, she doesn't care enough. And I don't care enough to hear excuses.

The other girl from yesterday finally submitted her extra credit summaries, which she did as a text file and formatted it so that half of the summary was red and italicized and overall formatted weirdly. One was okay, the other was only half a page and didn't include a works cited.

I'm sorry, but for a summary, if I don't have some way of knowing what you summarized, how do I know whether or not what you wrote was plagiarized? Or completely bullshitted and made up?

Something similar came from the lab partner of the would-be plagiarizer. He submitted one, but didn't give a works cited. Fortunately there was still time until the deadline and I told him he needed to give me his works cited. He then submitted another summary, only this one was half a page because he put his works cited on the same page as the summary and took up about a quarter of the page with his heading.

Some students are not going to be happy with their grades. And quite honestly I don't care because they will be in the minority.

One of the Few Times I Feel Bad About Being a Hardass

So today is the deadline for extra credit in my class. I say in the syllabus and I said at the beginning of the semester that for extra credit, each student can read and summarize up to 5 scientific articles for 2 points each. If they do all 5, they move up an entire grade.

Now remember, I said this at the beginning of the semester. I also sent out a reminder after the last lab of the semester 3 weeks ago. I sent a reminder last week. And this week.

So imagine my surprise when I get an email that says this:

"Is there any possible way I could turn in the extra credit Monday? I have had an extremely busy week with three finals. I've completed one extra credit article but I'm pretty sure that is not enough to move to an 80."


I do feel kind of bad because the deadline being today isn't necessary in the sense that I need these in so I can have your grades done just in the knick of time for being submitted. I chose today because ideally everything would already be done and it gave my students between 2-3 weeks to know that hey, if they want a better grade, they have some time to do the extra credit. 


I also feel bad because there's really no reason for anyone in my class to get a C.


BUT. I need to stick to my guns here. It's not fair to the (few) students who turned in their summaries on time. On top of that, I'm giving them extra credit if they saw African Cats during opening week so as to maximize the amount of funds that go to saving the savannah. If I comply to every complainer in my classes, nothing would ever get done.


So, in conclusion, student, we all have busy weeks. But you had time to know what grade you had and whether or not you'd need to do the extra credit. Planning your time wisely is an essential lesson in college and I hope you've learned it well. Clearly, my class has not been a priority for you, and as you are a non-science major I can somewhat understand. Circumstances being what they are (i.e. you not doing well in my class and waiting until the last minute to do anything about it, and then asking me to extend a deadline that you've known about all semester), you're stuck with a C. 


Too bad. So sad. Better luck next time.










I mean, really? Teaching this class has shown me that quite a few people with little common sense and/or sense of independent thinking do actually get into college. Which is frightening. I really feel that the standards for getting into college should be stricter. And so should the primary education standards. Education should be more valued, and not religiously skewed. Teaching young people to think for themselves in primary school should be required. So should the value of planning and getting shit done.